Journey to the end... Destinations are few...

My tea's gone cold, I'm wondering why I got out of bed at all

The morning rain clouds up my window and I can't see at all

And even if I could it'd all be grey, but your picture on my wall

It reminds me that it's not so bad, it's not so bad

I drank too much last night, got bills to pay, my head just feels in pain

I missed the bus and there'll be hell today, I'm late for work again

And even if I'm there, they'll all imply that I might not last the day

And then you call me and it's not so bad, it's not so bad and

I want to thank you for giving me the best day of my life

Oh just to be with you is having the best day of my life 

Push the door, I'm home at last and I'm soaking through and through

Then you hand me a towel and all I see is you

And even if my house falls down, I wouldn't have a clue

Because you're near me and  

I want to thank you for giving me the best day of my life

Oh just to be with you is having the best day of my life

These days I am getting some time to sit back and think, introspect and reflect to my "Journey to the end" during last couple of years. More I try to bring it out here, more I get confused, if I will be able to decipher. Overall, it has been an overwhelming Journey, more than a couple of halfway achievements, and some hiccups.

When I start looking at what I had expected out of myself, Facts and Realities dawn at me. I have made so many mistakes, I have been lazy, I have been ignorant, I have messed up, I have been impulsive, I have got furiously angry, I have not empathized enough, I have not handled situations the way it was expected out of me, I have not met expectations... but above all, I have this constant feeling that I have failed myself, if not anyone else.

Did I give my 100% or was I even trying 10%? I can not freeze the number here... but did I try?

Life will never give me these two years again, for that matter any of my previous years again. If I tried more... I know... I could have been more practical, I could have been less emotional, I could have been proactive, I could have done my homework, I could have controlled my anger, I could have been more compassionate, I could have thought before spilling it out... I know even then it would have created some mess, even then some expectations would still have been hanging mid-way... but above all, I would have felt proud, proud of myself that I gave 100%.

I did try... Yes, I tried... but I was not upto my own expectation... As 2008 is rushing by... I make myself this commitment that I will try... I will try even more... 

Lets 2009 end with a loud and firm belief in me, above everyone else who may have endless expectation out of me, 

"Yes I gave my 100%... Yes I tried 100%".